Sunday, April 26, 2009

Defying the Odds

Every day Daughter of Purpose defies the odds with every step that she takes, but every Saturday she goes above and beyond that when she plays T-ball. Never in a million years did those in her Russian orphanage ever think she'd being doing something such as this.




I wish I could describe for you what it is like to be the parent of a special needs child. I suppose it's not that much different than that of a "normal" child, but yet it's like taking your parenting and putting it in overdrive. I (and my husband) am my child's best advocate because no one knows her better than we do. In those moments when doctors and physical therapists have basically let us know that this is the best they can do for her, it is us who has to step up to the plate, pushing forward to use whatever resources we have to continue on in what we think is best for her. We've had to use our own "tools" and common sense and not rely on others to do it for us. We are with her day in and day out so it is us who encourages her to press on and knows her limitations--always pushing her a little beyond what she thinks she can do. We are the ones who won't allow her to cop out and take the easy route and when she sets her mind to something it is us who stands beside her and cheers her on to succeed.

I won't kid you though, it can be a mixed bag--we can sometimes be tempted to be discouraged. We've also had moments when we've had to reconcile our hopes with reality. We all have dreams for our children, but sometimes those dreams need to be adjusted and it can be depressing to realize that your child doesn't naturally have the same abilities as her peers. It can be frustrating to deal with people's ignorance and their stares. We will never forget the moment when it dawned on us that our child may never ride a bike. We won't soon forget that after less than a year, the physical therapist basically told us that he didn't know how to help, nor the moment when the doctors basically told us this was the top of the line for her.

But we cannot dwell on these things. That's how we've gotten this far--by thinking outside of the box. Who knows, maybe she will ride a bike, but it just might need some alterations to the bike. Maybe she'll go on to be a top athlete in softball, but it might be in a different league than our other kids. It's just a matter of perspective. While we raise this incredible child that defies the odds simply by walking, we will not settle and we certainly will not dwell on the negative thoughts. We recognize that how Daughter of Purpose views the world will be learned from us. How we respond to peoples stares and questions will be the way she responds. If we accept defeat--so will she.


So we will be forever grateful that God gave us this child to raise that has taught us so much, especially that life is in the eye of the beholder. Maybe she's right (remember when she said this last summer?), I will sit in the crowded Olympic arena one day and scream my head off for my Daughter of Purpose and I know which voices will rise above all the others--the voices of her family that didn't settle, but saw something in her and pushed her on toward greatness.


May these simple Saturdays of T-ball be only the beginning...


1 Samuel 1:27 "I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him."

Monday, April 6, 2009